Sara, you might be saying right now, this is a lot of food you’re posting about all of a sudden. You’re not trying to become one of those food blogs, are you?

The answer is: no. At least, I don’t think so. It’s just that I’ve got two real interests right now – food and words. Occasionally, they overlap. I can’t help that. I’m not doing it on purpose. I’m not going to say I have nothing else to do (putting together IKEA furniture and cleaning are things I should be doing but am not necessarily going to do right now). I just have so many words that need to be spat out. Might as well put them here. And it just so happens that a lot of those words are about food. I also have lots of words about dead babies. That’s what this blog is about: dealing with the death of my child and food. The whole food thing is just therapy for losing Lauren. I had grand plans about sharing adventures in the kitchen with Lauren, and for now, it’s how I’m coping with the loss of her. It’s just therapy. I won’t apologize for whatever it is I may write about, be it pregnancy loss and stillbirth or cooking and baking. I don’t have any set theme for what I write here. I just write what comes out.

My daughter’s birthday is next Friday, so I’ll be talking a lot about dead babies this coming week. Today, I’ll talk about cupcakes.

I’ve already explained a bit why cupcakes have become my baking “thing.” (see again that whole thing about dead babies) I may have stopped posting about them, but I haven’t stopped making them. In fact, since I made my first cupcakes back in January, I’ve made 35 different varities of cupcakes.

Yes, 35. I’m not even sure how that happened. The urge to make cupcakes just kept coming; I couldn’t stop it. At this point, I don’t think I will.

Here’s number 36: Sesame Honey Cupcakes from The Cupcake Project.

I stumbled across this recipe some time ago and saved it on Pinterest with the intention of making it if I ever happened to have tahini around. At the time, I gave no thought to making it on my own, even though that’s what the brilliant Cupcake Project lady did. When I went searching for a tahini recipe, I found hers. And used it. And then figured I would do as she suggested and make sesame honey cupcakes with it. I had plenty of it. Still have plenty of it, for that matter.

These came out more muffiny than cupcakey. They were still tasty; they were just very different from my previous cupcake experiences. They were not overly sweet, which was actually a nice change from some of the super-sweet cupcakes I’ve done in the past. In the cake part itself, honey supplements the sugar, so it’s a very mild sweetness. And there’s no sugar at all in the cream cheese frosting, just honey. Tahini went into both cupcake and frosting, so there’s a nice tang in there that really mellows out the sweet. They were really a very cozy, comfy cupcake that went quite nicely with our Autumn Equinox dinner: Moroccan sweet potato soup with a side of baba ghanoush.

Also, they went over really well at Geordie’s work, so that makes me happy. He took a dozen of them and came home with none, so that’s a victory as far as I’m concerned. I’d probably make them again, if I have tahini again at some future date. I’d make them smaller, but otherwise, I think they’re fine as they are. A nice change from typical cupcakey sweetness.

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